Terrible Week

I don't know how long have I abandoned this blog. I've been so emo lately, thanks to the super difficult visa requirement. Constant call from my sis and mom also not helping. Please stop implying that I didn't do anything to make this easier. I'm sorry if I sounded so annoyed when I pick up the calls, but yelling at me and blaming me for the late visa really makes me sick. It's not my fault if the Uni haven't give me the visa letter, I myself don't want to drag the progress.

Since last week I've tried many ways to settle the problems, but there's always something that prevent me from doing so. I run to 4 offices and 3 banks in Subang, PJ and KL for nothing. The only correct information that I got led me to Wangsa Maju, but I still have problems with my bank statement. I tried to send it as fast as I can and I still can't make it on time. I was so frustrated that I almost cry in the middle of the road. I almost lost hope and think that maybe I'm not supposed to get it, maybe I should just wait until next year. Luckily I'm more stubborn that I myself think. Now, one problem down but I still need to wait until Tuesday to see if the bank in my hometown could help to settle the problem.

Another thing about Uni, my mom tell me to just stay in the dorm since she's so worried about me. Actually at fist me and Chris plan to stay together outside the dorm in a flat, but because my mom still do not agree, I ended up in dorm. Let's hope I still can get a room in the dorm.

Tomorrow I'll go back to Wangsa Maju to take the translation of my certificate then take it to Indonesian embassy to get it legalized. Let's see if fate decided to screw my life again.

Radiohead - Bulletproof... I Wish I Was

FML

Since 2 days ago I broke my bedroom's doorknob, but I'm too busy to change it so I just let it be. For safety I always put my bedroom key outside, but today when I collect my laundry, I FORGOT about it. Therefore I locked outside my room without key =.=

----

Ok, I actually planned to write long ass entry about today's incident, but after this blog writing activity inevitably interrupted I suddenly lost the mood D:
So I'll just sums up everything:
1. Wounded my thumb because of the door incident, and it HURTS SO MUCH.
2. The door ended up looking so ugly =.=

3. I love my bookmark design so much =D Will sell it for graduation campaign bazaar :)
4. Steven's reaction when I said I liked Anton Yelchin in Star Trek and Terminator Salvation
Translation:
"But Nyuuus Anton Yelchin is a little boy"
"how come?"
"HOW COME?"

LOLOLOLOL xD He's 20 ok, old enough for me xD


ok, that's pretty much sums up what I wanted to say D:
And song of the day, Starlight by Muse

So Unmotivated

I don't know what's wrong with me, but seems like every term 2 I will lose my motivation in doing my assignment. Seriously, when I tell myself to do my assignment, the first word that come to me is "UGH!". I don't know what happened, I really really feels sooooooo unmotivated and moody. I also feel that everything is boring. One side of me feel so worried because I slack so much this term, while the other one don't care about anything because it feels like a torture to start working on my assignment. Somebody help me!!!!!!

Character Design Fail

After I print screen this, I close my PS and forget to save it. @$#%#^!@#$@#$@!!!

Frustated Post

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *bites blanket* shite shite shite! I HATE YOU ADM!!!!!! T_______T

Kittens, Onlympic and Character Death

Woots! My cat give birth to 3 kittens today! She keep meow-ing since 5.30, but finished the labor around 10.30~ Congrats, mommy cat!

Btw, also want to congrats Indonesia for getting gold medal in onlympic! :D Go go Indonesia! Too bad we didn't win any medal from single player in badminton though. But it' already very good, ok! :D We only send 24 players and so far we already gotn 5 medal so far :)

Actually our goverment promised the athlete that if they got any medal they will got a big amount of cash. No wonder all athlete become so motivated :P For gold medalist they will get Rp1Billion (around US$100,000++), silver will get Rp300million (around US$34,000), bronze will get around Rp125million (around US$15,000). According to what I read in newspaper Singapore is the country who will pay the most if their athlete got gold medal, they'll give 1million euro! @_@ That's because the last medal that they ever got was in 1996~

Btw, just finished reading Cable and Deadpool comic. And I'm sooooooooooo angry!!!!! Why Cable must die??????? At first I thought they'll resurrect him again (just like before) but then actually they really kill him!!! T____T Why the characters that I like almost always die?????? What the heck man!!!! T_________T

I also re-read The Silmarillion (The history of middle earth before the war of the ring in Lord of the Rings), and again, the characters that I like dieeeeeeee~~~~~~ T___T
1. Ereinion Gil-Galad
Why the high king of Noldor die????? T____T He's the last high king! T__T
2. Echtelion
After killing Gothmog and another 2 balrogs you kill him????
3. Glorfindel
Killed after he kill a balrog too, stupidly getting killed because the Blarog snatched his hair and bring him down to valley with the balrog. Well, at least he'll ressurected again later.
4. Maedhros and Maglor
2 of 7 sons of Feanor, if only the oath didn't consume them... :( And the last scene when Maglor throw the silmaril to the sea and sing his lament is really really sad T____T

Well, at least Elrond survived all of the chaos though. But he really really got such a tragic fate T__T

Foul Mood

Lately I keep having mood swing. Today must be one of the worst. I really really easily irritated by anything. Good thing I still can try not to be angry IN PUBLIC. Even though honestly inside my heart boils. I think today is the day where I swear the most. Yea, even though I didn't speak the words out, it's like a repeating words in my mind. I really hated when somebody try to make me like a stupid dumb bimbo girl that can't do anything by myself. Fine, OBVIOUSLY I can't drive in KL, I don't have any driving experience in big cities, I admit that my driving skills sucks much. But it doesn't mean that I'm a stupid girl just because of that, ok? I really don't know why you really insist that I can't do anything by myself. Do you really need to prove that you're far smarter than me? Do you really need to prove that I'm just a spoiled girl? That I always need anybody to help me to do anything?

I only mad about that one, other things I admit that's just because of my foul mood. I'm sorry to any of my classmates if my foul mood disturb you. I just easily feel irritated today. Somehow I turned into an emo kid who think that everyone just try to pick me. But at least I realized it and don't make it as a big deal. I don't scream and cry mindlessly saying that other people stupid and they're not better than me. I know and I understand that all my anger due to my foul mood. For the rest of the day, I try to not spoke so much. I know with my condition any of my word and the respondent's word can make me in even worse mood. But honestly I think should've deal with my mood better la. Usually it's quite easy for me to just ignore anything that can flame my anger. But seems like lately my patience become thinner and thinner.

Few days ago I talked with Brad and from there I think I already must admit that this term is not my best term. I must say that mostly my work sucks, but I know I deserve that. I think I didn't work hard enough. Because of this realization I promise myself that I'll do my best for web design and video, two last assignment this term. Wish me luck!

So, song of the day to lighten my mood:

LOL. OMG I can't believe that i choose this song.

Update: somehow I feel my mood become lighter after I rant here! =D

Emotion Management

Lately it becomes harder for me to control my emotion. I feel so emo lately~ AAAAA~!!! I know why but I'm still in half denial stage =___= please let me emo-ing for a while peacefully~~!!!

The impact is quite bad though. Makes it hard for me to control my emotion. Now I read a story I cry, watch a movie I also cry, cannot do my assignment also cry, even talk to my friend I also can cry! Alamakjang~! Like today somebody quite piss me off, makes me really want to scream and swear at that person (involve many unwanted words and an erection from a finger). Good that I still have a little bit control left for me, so I just go out and just try to cool my anger. Really need to gain back my control T___T I think I'm a bit control freak la... =_=;;

Oh yeah, about the trip to Melaka, will post it next time. Need to edit my photography assignment first!

Moving On

Somehow, when I need an honest opinion, I know I'll always be able to ask you. It amazed me on how you actually understand me more than I thought you do. I used to think of you as my younger brother, but now you've grown, while I still stuck here. I used to think I've already moving on, but as we talk, I realized that actually I'm still in the same position. Maybe I've face different sides of the road, but I'm still on the same spot. Like what you said, when experience beats the current situation, I'll held back and unconsciously repeating the same pattern as before. I've screwed the situation last year, and I foresee it'll happen again in near future if I do not change the way I think and how I will resolve the problem. Well, like what you said again, the problem is not about me. Actually all are only in my mind, I only need to beat my own thinking, my own prejudice about this. I need to break the wall and face the problem, not runaway like what I always do.

Someday, you have to move on. Faster, better.

I know, I know. Wish me luck.

Thank You

Thank you for listening to me when I'm down.
Thank you for pushing me when I want to stop.
Thank you for being patient with me.
Thank you for all your support.
Thank you for believe in me.
Thank you for being such a good friend.
Thank you. You know who you are.

Worry

Somehow I feel so worried. Dunno why. Usually even though I got a lot of assignment also I wont feel like this. Now I even trembled. I don't know lah, I really feel so worried. Worried worried worried worried worried worried worried worried worried worried worried worried until I think I must post something just to speak out my worry. I feel like I can hear my heart beat man~ Maybe because I drink too much coffee?

What Kind of World do You Want?

What kind of world do you want? A world where I won't be so uninspired! T_T

Argh~! Dunno lah, for web design I really don't have any clear idea in my mind. Some more those stupid Mobil don't have any of their latest ad in internet. I tried to find in youtube, google, etc etc etc and even eBay but still I can't find any. If like this how I could work for my website??????????????????? *bites blanket*
Actually I plan to go to any local Mobil gas station, but because I was sooooo busy with photography I forgot about it...

My fault, I know.

But as the BIGGEST oil company in the world, at least you'll have some ads duh! Even in youtube their latest ads was when it's in 80s! Another ads that I found was in 1995... and that's the recent one that I could find. Other ads that I could find are vintage ones =_=
AAAAAA KILL ME NOW~!!! *stab pillow* *bites bites*

SUPER RANDOM OMG OMG OMG
When I go to cutting ropes, suddenly I see a random doodle that I draw years ago there O___o
OMG. Sorry, I'm just surprised suddenly I see my own drawings in other sites except DA O_o
I dunno what to react though. A bit like "OMG WTH???" because somebody use it without my permission, but for that kind of project ofcourse nobody will ask me for permission to publish their secret =_= I see there also some artwork might be not by the sender, and the sender is an anonymous. But still...
Hope anonymous sender will get over her problem though =/

The Forgotten Child

Well, Rave finally become the student of TOA! 8DDDD And finally he can contact me few days ago. So here's the conversation:

tanyus.indrayani: so where do you live?
lunatic_rave: cyberjaya
tanyus.indrayani: seriously
lunatic_rave: yes xD;;;
tanyus.indrayani: O____O
tanyus.indrayani: and I though it's freaking far
earthquake_tool: how far?
lunatic_rave: like from Jakarta to Bogor
earthquake_tool: xD;;;

So, last Thursday we met and plan to help him find another place to stay in Friday.
No such luck in Mentari Court, but luckily I called Wahyu! Guess what? Now Wahyu got a new housemate 8D
Yes, Rave will stays in Wahyu's place 8D
Phew! Finally Rave got a new place! Poor Rave, everyday take taxi from Cyberjaya to Sunway ^^; That make him broke and like what he said, "eat like a very poor student" LOL.
Btw, this is what Rave said about Mentari Court:

At first I though I come to the wrong place, there's building construction and lots of dust. It feels like in a cowboy movie.

Me and Nesia just LOLed at that. He looks so relived to that he doesn't have to live in Mentari Court xD;;;


Btw, I feel soooooo annoyed with my neighbor. They rudely THROW THEIR RUBBISH IN FRONT OF OUR DOOR!!! I just caught them when I just finished writing the entry above. I'M SO ANNOYED! So I kick the rubbish in front of them! I also suspect they're the one who make pranks of us, stopping our water in the morning! GRR! DAMN ANGRY MAN!!! *almost want flash middle finger* =___________=####


Ugh, and about the title, my mom forget about me DDDDD:
Me: Mom, have you send the money for this month? Because I haven;t received any, maybe they delayed again like before?
Mom: *laugh* Sorry, mom forget so send it.
Me: DDDDDDDDDD:::: ????????????????????? T.T

Monstrous Appetite

Lately I ALWAYS feel hungry every 2 hours or so. OMG, even when I'm writing this I'm thinking how nice if now I have a bowl of noodles in front of me. With uncontrollable appetite lately, I'm getting fatter D: Not that I mind if I gain 2-3 more kgs, but the problem is I always LAZY to cook anything HEALTHY to eat after 10am++. The only alternative is not the not so healthy McD >_> I'm not gonna eat McD for 3 times in a week! Actually there also instant noodles, but like I said before after 10am I started to get lazy to cook even simple instant noodles. And if you guys ask me to just buy snacks, I don't really like eating snacks =_= the only snacks that I like is only chocolate.

So I always drink milk+honey instead, since I though it's safe enough for me to drink it everyday :D BUT! Yesterday in photography class I read in newspaper that actually drinking milk everyday is not good for our stomach.

Me: So how??? I drink it everyday! DD:
Chris: Who told you to stop drinking, just reduce it la!

So here I am now, hungry, without anything to eat. Should I just give up and ordered McD instead? Or I must move my lazy ass and cook something instead? I don't think so =_=

Update: Instant noodles win!

Surprise!

This is what I got when I restarted my computer just now.
Sweet.

Mobil Will be The Death of Me

It's 3.22 am now, and I still researching for my assignment. I'm still lamenting a bit on how could I got Mobil's website to redesign. I really know nothing about car, fuels, etc @_@ But in real work later I really can't choose my client though, so can't do anything but to research madly because I know nothing about fuels and cars while I must redesign an oil company's website @_@

Still see Chen and Wahyu online in MSN now, at least I'm not alone :p Even though I envy Sel that already sleep since 3 hours ago T____T

Plan to watch The Orphanage with classmates tomorrow today, dunno if my eyes can keep open when watch the movie. Some more I hate horror movie, but Chen insisted that even though scary, The Orphanage is not a horror movie. Which confuse me @_@

Argghh enough resting now, must continue doing my assignment again. Go me!